10/52

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie

Nana bought you a fluffy. I think you quite liked it...!!

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Elanor

sick girl snoozing in Mama and Dadda's bed. Ain't no place you'd rather be.

joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity

9/52

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie

 We had to go to the hospital for your eye appointment and ended up being there for 2 and a half hours. An hour of which you had blurry drops in your eyes. Thank goodness for a comfy wrap and Mama snuggles.

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Elanor

Today you told me a most involved story at play circle. I love to hear the ways your mind weaves the places and characters into the most amazing of tales!

joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity

sleep update #3...

Maggie is now fully off the breast after she feeds to sleep between 7 and 7.30 (sometimes earlier) until around 6am. Sometimes she wakes up once in that period...sometimes she doesn't wake up at all!! Joy!

BUT...

Elanor is a sleep walker. I think her mind works over time, even at night (a bit like her Daddy) and the last few nights she has been getting up an weeing in strange places. Always fun. Not. I am hoping that once she starts big kindy next week this will settle down. We've been talking about it a bit in preparation so perhaps she is a bit apprehensive and that is causing her to walk more. She has also started, seperate from the sleep walking, screaming in the night to wake Maggie up. She has told us it's on purpose. INFURIATING! She won't go back to sleep in her own bed without a fight. There's no room in our bed and she won't sleep on the floor in our room. I have resorted to a sticker chart where she gets a sticker if she has a good night then 10 stickers = a treat of her own choosing. Let's see how it goes.

Ain't that always the way - one thing gets better then something else comes along to rock the boat.

Hey, that's parenthood ya'll!!

8/52

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Elanor

You were very tired and snuggly this morning. I cherish these times...I don't get as many snuggles now that you're a big ol' grown up girl. 

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie 

Cheeky AS.

joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity

7/52

a tad late... sorry!

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Elanor

I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your tower down! It took you a while and a LOT of puff, but it did eventually fall.

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie

Today you were super tired. You fell asleep standing up on Dadda.


joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity

6/52

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Elanor

You LOVE to climb trees. Today you were a Mama duck looking for a place to lay her 22,000 ducklings. You are going to be one busy Mama duck!

 

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie

That smile... gets me every time!

 

joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity

 

spoken word - Hollie McNish

I just cannot get enough of listening to this woman at the moment.

I was first introduced to Hollie when somone shared the video for "embarrassed", a poem about her breastfeeding experience. I was BLOWN AWAY. The way this woman is able to articulate her thoughts, my thoughts, so beautifully yet with real edge is amazing. I cannot take my eyes or ears off her once I have pressed play.

I have often thought about spoken word. It is something I enjoy listening to and I do write a bit but I'm not sure it's something I could do myself. I am a performer, yes, but I don't know if I would be able to let myself be free enough to work up moment and rhythm of this kind.

I'll stick to SW in the shower...

you enjoy Megatron - this one almost had me in tears.

sleep update #2

We have come to a point where Maggie is no longer feeding in the night - I sort of thought this day would never come! She still wakes anywhere between 1 and 4 (last night!) times a night but doesn't ask for BB. Actually, it's pretty weird - some of the times she wakes up and just writhes around, doesn't want cuddles, nothing will help. She writhes and groans/cries for a while then goes back to sleep. It's like she doesn't know how to get comfortable enough to go back to sleep.
While I am OK about the night feeds being dropped (mostly for the quest for bebe #3) because the day feeds remain plentiful I feel sad that she doesn't want to cuddle or be stroked or talk or anything when she's in the writhey place. Luckily not every night waking is like that.

So, I guess night-weaning mission accomplished?! But sleep...yeah... we'll get there!

insert cute sleeping baby photo >

5/52

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Elanor

You found a frog in the swimming pool and put it on your finger. After a bit of explanation and coaxing you took him off and back into the water but he came right back to you! Joy!

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie

I told you to go and get ready for the library. You cam back like this. Awesome. 

joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity

4/52

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Elanor

You LOVE the beach my girl, just like your Mama! You made yourself a black sand beard and were showing off your big muscles. Raaaaaar!

 

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie

You are not so much a fan of the beach. The sand was fine. Rockpools, fine. But it was the waves, they made you uneasy. While your sister and I dashed in and out of the water you preferred to sit on Dada's knee and watch, with a look of quiet consternation.


joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity
 

TTC over share...

Once again, because I am aware that very few people read these ramblings I am going to (potentially) over share and have a rant. Here I go...

We have been TTC #3 in earnest for about 7 months. Now, I know that is not a very long time in the scheme of things and many, many couples try for way longer but it is feeling like FOREVER. It has never taken us more than 3 months before and every month is just a huge downer. Last month and this month it has really upset the Mr too, which has sucked. I guess I didn't realize, being wrapped up in my own crazy-lady-want-a-bebe place that he is quite keen on the idea too. Duh!
We were hoping for a smaller gap between kiddies this time around, but that ain't happening. First off I didn't get a cycle back until Maggie was about 13 months and they have been strange since. In saying that, the last 3 had come down (from 43) to 34 days so we were all ready and amped up for this one to be the same....NAH.

Day 18
Me:(thinking)          Awesome, ovulation some time over this weekend. Hooray!!
                                We'll so make a bebe this time...

My body:                NAH! Period! Sucker.

So it arrives, what we thought to be mid cycle. And breaks my freaking heart. >Insert crazy lady crying inside her wardrobe here< (that was me. I totally did that...)

So now we're kind of confused and unsure of where to go next. The obvious answer is chill out, have sex 3 times a week, every week and wait for it to happen... easier said than done. But we're going to try. I (we) just have to try not to get so attached to the idea of adding to our clan. Again, easier said than done.
I am also going to give night weaning a good go. Really. Well...I'm going to try harder anyway. There is not a period of more than 4 hours, day or night, that Maggie does not feed and I am sure (from research) that this is contributing to the wacky cycles.

I am by no means forgetting or minimizing the fact that we already have two insanely awesome children who we (mostly!) highly enjoy! It does make it hard though when the biggest little says things like "is Mavis in your belly yet? It kind of looks like she is?" and "when are we going to get a baby. Tomorrow? You have to tell me so I can draw it a picture kay?"...the cuteness...sigh.

I know that we could on the TTC rollercoaster for a while longer and while it's not a journey I enjoy, I am trying to be present and connect with the whole experience. Many couples try for years and years without any joy. I know this. It's one of the reasons I want to be a surrogate after our own family is complete.

But for now, I am consumed with the desire to grow a babe in this belly.

Patience.

sleep update #1...

So, sorry Dr. Jay Gordon, as wonderful as your method sounded I have to admit I have not followed it through. I have decided that the best thing for us at the moment is to just go with what works in the moment. Some nights Maggie will go back to sleep with a cuddle, some nights not. I am consciously trying to delatch her before she is asleep though. Unless I am unconscious, then... not so much.
The main reason for this is that she doesn't make a fuss when I stick a boob in her mouth and it is better for everyone's sleep if the night is quiet. Catch my drift? So for now we will continue to do whatever works at a given time...but with a slightly more conscious (unless I am, as previously mentioned, unconscious) effort not to feed her all the way back to sleep during the night.
Last night she did one of her longest stretches in her whole life EVER - 7pm-12.45am. 5 hours and 45 mins. BOOYAH!
And now you're probably falling asleep at the boringness of my night life. Hey, at least someone is asleep...!!

3/52

Right, I'm finished playing catch up now, phewf! I am really enjoying taking time to get to actually take pictures. I don't have a fancy phone camera so don't often taken photos of the random little things. This project is encouraging/forcing me to get the camera out more and document these growing critters.

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Elanor

This week our new friends gave us their first egg and you take great delight in being the one to collect it. Also to eat it. Dippy egg is definitely a firm favourite!

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie

Every time we're out in the garden you pick beans to eat. You try and feed them to the chickens, to your sister, to me...to anyone who;ll take them. You love the raw beans!

joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity

thoughts on smacking...

I realize this may be a tad controversial but seeing as I have a tiiiiiiny readership and I need to get some thoughts out of my head I'm going to go for it...

Was on facebook (aka. demon timesucker) and a "friend" asked about what to do with her 2 year old with and attitude problem. The number of people who responded telling her to give her daughter a whack disturbed me. I really felt like saying "bro, that is illegal for a reason!"...but I didn't. Instead I wrote about how I deal with my children in difficult moments then felt like a giant hippy for trying to relate to my children as small people and acknowledge their feelings. I do realize that sometimes children go feral, I know this, for a fact but I often find that distraction/being taken to a quiet place for a chat/a cuddle/being let loose outside works for us more than I could ever imagine a smack doing. I'm not saying people who smack their children are all "bad parents", more like good parents with a bad idea? Disclaimer: I am also in no way claiming to be the perfect parent. At. All.

It got me to thinking though if these adults who regularly smack their children for breaking rules would be so happy to be bent over the bonnet of their car and spanked whenever they got pulled over for speeding. Or whether they think that people who break the law should be flogged instead of being given "time out" in prison. Hey, maybe I'm making assumptions... maybe these people are all law abiding folk, apart from the smacking thing.

I find it strange that people would be against physical punishment in schools, yet happily smack their children to "teach them a lesson" at home. I know most would say we're just talking about a tap on the bum but hitting is hitting man! And don't even start me on the madness of hitting your child as a punishment for them having hit someone else.

A hug doesn't fix everything, but it is a pretty good place to start.

2/52

Let use pretend that the first week of the year didn't happen. It almost doesn't count...you know, every one is still in holiday mode and...yeah. Week 2 - 

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014. - Elanor

This is how you can be found for a lot of your day - concentrating furiously on colouring in or drawing a picture. You get annoyed when Maggie tries to join you, until we get her her own paper. Then you sit quietly and enjoy the crayons on the page. 

A portrait of my daughter, once a week, every week, in 2014 - Maggie

You were intensely excited that your big sis was going to join you on the "trampalium". You'd been hounding for a while, bouncing up and down around the house, pointing out the window and saying "bunst, bunst!"...finally it happened...joy!

joining in with Jodi at practising simplicity

chuckles...

I was looking back through old posts from 2012 and found the ones about the no-cry sleep solution. As you can tell from my almost forgetting that it ever happened, it didn't go too well. And here we are...at almost 2 years old, waking every two hours in the night for a boob. It doesn't bother me all that much - I've become used to functioning on such little sleep, mostly - but baby number 3 is never going to come along with such frequent night nursings. Not so much the finding the time or being too tired for the party but more the physiological luteal phase/cycle related things...
And so, we've turned to Dr Jay Gordon's changing sleep patterns in the family bed. By all accounts it seems to be gentle but also effective. We'll see.
I think, before we disliked the frequent waking but not so much that we were willing to make it worse to make it better. Now we're ready. We're ready to get her back to sleep in other ways and while it may take longer (and be louder) at first *hopefully* after that it'll get better. Right?
The basic gist as I understand it is for 3 nights, between 11pm and 6am, you give them a short feed but take them off before they're asleep and just cuddle until they are. The next 3 nights you miss out the feeding part and just go straight to the cuddling (this is the part I am DREADING). Then the next 4 nights you talk and touch/rub/pat but as minimal as possible.
I really want to continue feeding during the day and outside those 7 hours so this seems to be a good plan for us at the moment.
I am nervous but hopeful and prepared to be even more exhausted for the next little while.

new year...

With the new year I am thinking about returning to this place, if only to join in with the 52 weeks project over at practising simplicity (I'm well aware that I'm two weeks behind!). I think it would be good for me to document, mainly for myself, these girls as they grow.

Goals in this household for 2014 -
simplify (everything)
we started out well, having a huge clean out on boxing day. We have had another one since and four trips to the Sallies later (who could believe it!) we are feeling a lot lighter.

get better at what I do (sewing-wise)
In 2013 I started selling my little foxes at markets and on facebook. This year I plan to add a few things to the repertoire and to hone my skills. I also want to sew as much as possible (as time allows) for the girls.
Here's my facebook page - cuttapea

intentional time with each girl
The days fly by and this year I want to make a real effort to spend time with the girls as individuals. Because Maggie still feeds quite heavily it is easy for me to steal moments with her but Elanor proves more tricky...I guess that's what happens as the bigger one becomes more and more independent and needs you to do less and less for them? So, intentionally making time for each.

intentional adult time
not that kind of adult time! There seems to be very little time in our day for talking uninterrupted, pottering in the garden, spending time nourishing each other. Trite, but this year we are planning to have a "date" a month - go out for fro yo, take a walk...nothing too crazy (read, expensive) as well as trying to take a moment each day to reconnect.

finish my LLL leadership
I was recently asked if I'd like to work towards becoming a La Leche League leader and jumped at the chance! I plan to finish it all before the end of this year. That's the plan anyway...

more sleep
always! Maggie is a shocker so...there is no plan on how to help her sleep longer/more but...

keep gardening
this is more the husband guy's domain than mine but I'm learning a lot and loving it. We are working towards being able to provide (mostly) for ourselves, one day. Also, I just bought 3 chickens - Marjorie, Unicorn-sparkle and Buttercup.

So, come at us 2014! Let's see what happens...

join me on bloglovin?

<a href="http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/5206895/?claim=7zppxz23bjv">Follow my blog with Bloglovin</a>

all the cool kids are doing it, or so I hear.

x